I don’t know who I am anymore
I keep bruising myself for more
As I look myself in the mirror
I found nothing but only the reflection of a greedy fool.
What is there that keeps my eyes blur?
I know I can see clearly
But are those the things that I’m looking for?
Everything and so much more?
Why am I doing this to myself?
To please myself, I guess.
“the one.. right.”
But I say that whenever I’m drunk
… when I see beauty or when my sexual advocate tells me so.
After that, when I get what I want…
it’ll be nothing once the moment passes.
I can be who I want to be
But I could never be me
(sigh) I left the real me in the closet of my upbringing
It’s really hard to follow myself
Because I’m afraid of losing
To be called a loser…
that’s why I choose and say “the one.. right.”
I do believe in myself
But the more I try, the less it is working
Oh, I can see alright
But all I can see are façades
I am easily overcome by whims and looks
It’s just that…
The thing is…
I am bothered of what I SEE rather than what I FEEL.